Here Lies June 2010...

June was a crazy month.  There were shows, incredibly hot weather, and more complaints about Kansas City than you can shake a stick at, but that's not the point.  The month began with the party folks from North Carolina, otherwise known as Widow making their, what seems to be an annual tradition now, return engagement to Kansas City along with Las Vegas, Nevada's party folks known as Seventh Calling.  As you would expect, there was much drinking and much metal music.  This month also saw the old man hit the big 7-0, so a party was held at Smithville Lake with family, including a few that made the trip from New Mexico.  The next morning, I went with the relatives to New Mexico, which for the first time in a while, didn't feel like a thirteen hour drive.  Well, there was an extra three hours to Albuquerque, but that's not important.  What is important is that road trips are what you make of it.  As Widow says, "Road trips can be fun if you choose to make it that way."

The week in New Mexico was hot, but not oppressively so.  That week included the Museum of Natural History and Sciences, a minor-league baseball game, sampling the night life, the zoo, and of course, Iron Maiden.  This month ended just like it began: with a metal show, featuring Skelator, and even though I had to turn in early, since it was a week night and I needed to be up early, it was a good show overall, though I would like for people here in Kansas City to actually try and make it out to more shows.

Comic Book Violence

Folks, gather around the fire (or whatever it is that you prefer) and let your ol' Uncle George A. Romero tell you some stories.  Well, let Romero and Stephen King tell you some stories, since Romero made the Stephen King and Bernie Wrightson comic Creepshow into a real life movie.

Here's the five stories that are in the first installation:

Father's Day: A rather fucked up story about a man who wants his Father's Day cake, even if it means rising up from the dead and getting revenge on his family.

The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill: Stephen King touches a meteor and turns into a plant.

Something to Tide You Over: Lt. Frank Drebin buries Becker and the woman from Dawn of the Dead up to their necks in sand, only to have their corpses get revenge on him.

The Crate: A pissed off Chewbacca eats anyone that gets near his home, and a rather annoying Adrienne Barbeau.

They're Creeping Up On You: Think Joe's Apartment, only with more vindictive cockroaches.

If any of the above is absurd to you, then you are right.  Romero plays up this factor, combining both the actual and comic book effects to a tee.  Yes, it is horror, but it will also make you laugh.

Flies and the Alps

Yesterday got me angry because the Portland Trailblazers are now looking for a new General Manager.  As you may know just by reading some of the ramblings on here, and even if you don't, if you actually talk to me, you know this, I am a Trailblazers fan.  Exactly why a team would fire a general manager that was doing a good job is beyond me, and barring the next guy coming in and doing just as good of a job, if not better, the owner will see some angry letters his way.

And tonight is the beginning of the NHL draft, for you folks interested in seeing how your team's future will look like in a few years.

Sports rants are out of the way, so on to something that I haven't done in a while: writing about horror movies.  I haven't been able to catch up on some of the movies that I had been meaning to get to, so here's one that I had seen more than once.  As you may also know just by reading this blog, I am into horror movies, especially Italian horror.  Today is another movie by Dario Argento, one of the more famous directors to come from the country shaped like a boot.  However, it isn't a classic, but rather, one of his worst efforts, though not for the lack of trying.

Phenomena was made in 1984 and was pretty much the beginning of the end in Argento's relationship with Daria Nicolodi, who is also in this movie.  The central plot of the movie is that a young girl (Jennifer Connelly) can communicate with insects.  This power is useful in trying to figure out who has been killing a few of the folks in Switzerland.  A few things to note about the movie: this was filmed in Switzerland, so everything you see in the movie is really what you would see in Switzerland in real life.  Second is the girl that gets killed in the beginning: that would be Fiore Argento, older daughter of Dario Argento and sister to Asia Argento.  Phenomena also had the distinction of being filmed with all the actors speaking in English, which proved to be a chore for the likes of Nicolodi.  The plot of the movie also had a few too many red herrings, meaning that things designed to throw you off were many to the point where one couldn't figure out what was relevant to the story.

The entire movie wasn't that great, as it was more of the normal horror movie than an Argento movie, and the soundtrack relied more on bands like Motorhead and Iron Maiden, which in some ways threw off the overall mood of the movie.  Bad, for sure, but it's still better than most of the movies released in the last decade or so.

Thoughts from Yesterday's NHL Awards

Can't you tell that I'm in hockey withdrawal when the thing I lead off with isn't the U.S. futbol team wins to make it into the knocout round?  Wait, I just did, but that's as far as I will go in this piece.  Last night was the NHL awards ceremony in Las Vegas, and like the years past, the NHL made sure to make a big deal out of it.  It doesn't drag out naming its winners well after the season is over like the MLB does (good thing), and it doesn't name its winners while the playoffs like the NFL and NBA do (bad thing), but the one thing that the NHL has going for itself is that it brings the glamour to the awards, even if most of the people have no idea how the awards got the names.

I'll try to keep this short, so here were the winners from last night, with my thoughts attached:

Calder Trophy (rookie of the year): Tyler Myers, Buffalo Sabres
I am not surprised at this selection, though I thought the voting would be a little closer.

Selke Trophy (defensive forward): Pavel Datsyuk, Detroit Red Wings

Disappointed that Ryan Kesler didn't win, but there is a reason why Datsyuk has won this trophy for a few years running now.

Jack Adams (coach): Dave Tippett, Phoenix Coyotes

No surprise here.  Having an uncertain ownership and team future in Phoenix and succeeding in making the playoffs is cause for a near unanimous vote.

Lady Byng (most gentlemanly player): Martin St. Louis, Tampa Bay Lightning

Any of the finalists (St. Louis, Datsyuk, Brad Richards) could have walked away with this trophy, but St. Louis' six penalties broke the tie, as they were the least number of penalties taken.

Vezina (goalie): Ryan Miller, Buffalo Sabres

I thought the voting would be much closer than it was, as Ilya Bryzgalov certainly deserved this trophy as well.  The Olympic performance of Miller must have put him over the top.

Norris (defenseman): Duncan Keith, Chicago Blackhawks

Right choice, although I wonder how Mike Green finished ahead of Drew Doughty.  Green has a bad habit of disappearing during the biggest games while Doughty shows up for the big games.

Hart (MVP): Henrik Sedin, Vancouver Canucks

This was the right choice.  Ovechkin finishing ahead of Crosby is a bit of a mystery, since Crosby put the Penguins on his back when Malkin had bouts of inconsistency.

Other award winners:

Masterton (perseverance): Jose Theodore, Washington Capitals
Mark Messier Leadership Award: Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins
Art Ross (most points): Henrik Sedin, Vancouver Canucks
Maurice "Rocket" Richard (most goals): Steven Stamkos, Tampa Bay Lightning; Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Penguins
King Clancy (humanitarian): Shane Doan, Phoenix Coyotes
Ted Lindsay (MVP as voted by players): Alexander Ovechkin, Washington Capitals

Yesterday (Language warning)

Take a good look at the picture to your left because that will likely be the calmest this post gets.  There are two things that I would like to address: France getting bounced out of the World Cup and the Hockey Hall of Fame naming its new inductees.  Before I get into either one, I would like to also say that the NHL Awards ceremony is tonight, so that should be fun.  Friday is the NHL draft, which save for the top three picks, rarely ever sees players make the direct jump to the senior circuit.

Now, on to the subjects for today.  Before I begin, if you happen to dislike salty language, please stop reading now or skip to the second subject, as the first subject is full of it.  Still here?  Okay.  Fuck you, France!  You didn't deserve to be in the World Cup and you damn sure acted like you didn't want to be there.  The 2010 version is a fucking disgrace and puts Zinedine "headbutt" Zidane to shame.  How bad was it?  Well, if the president of your country is calling the national football team a disgrace, that should say everything you want to know.  Throw in the poor sportsmanship after the game against South Africa, the soap opera before that, and the fact that the team got shitty flying arrangements back home, and it is easy to see why there isn't enough expletives for France.  And I didn't even mention that they screwed Ireland out of a spot that they rightfully deserved.  France, this is justice for your shit and you should have known that karma is a bitch.  Now, you are going home with your tail between your legs and a lesson in respect, you arrogant pricks!

Second thing I'd like to talk about: the Hockey Hall of Fame naming its inductees.  I am not surprised that most of the names up for induction weren't named, as very few, if any, really stood out.  No Steve Yzerman, no Brett Hull, no Luc Robitaille, and no Grant Fuhr, which was last year's class.  This year, it was Dino Ciccarelli, Cammi Granato, and Angela James.  It says something about the induction class when the two easiest inductions are women, and don't think of me as being chauvanist because both Granato and James did a lot to put women's hockey on the map in both the United States and Canada, respectively.  However, the fact that Ciccarelli is in, after a few years, speaks of how little most of the nominees were thought of for this year.  And even Ciccarelli was pretty much a pity selection, as even with the 600-goal career, he never won a Stanley Cup, wasn't necessarily recognized as a spectacular player, and wasn't all that great off the ice, all of which explains his exclusion from the HHOF for a few years since he was eligible for induction.  I guess the only real surprise here was Joe Nieuwendyk not making it, as it would have seemed that he had enough on the resume to make it.  Not spectacular, mind you, but enough to be included this year.  Everyone else, you could make a good argument as to why they shouldn't be inducted this year.

And Now For Something Completely Different...

No, it's not Monty Python that I will be talking about.  Instead, it is a more serious effort from Jackie Chan (Yes, that Jackie Chan) in the form of the Shinjuku Incident.  Most people might not have heard of this movie, as it saw a rather limited release in the United States.

The plot of the movie is that Steelhead (Chan) has come to Japan illegally from China in search of his fiancée.  He meets his "brother" and  sees his fiancée with another man, which leads him to try and become a  citizen of Japan legally.  One incident between the "brother" and a gang leader later, Steelhead decides to take revenge and in the process, saves a different gang leader, which leads to him finding out that the fiancée is married to the gang leader he saved and has a daughter.  Soon, he is head of a gang, but his ideals aren't going over well with the other immigrants that he travelled with, and a civil war breaks out.

Shinjuku Incident is a far cry from what people expect from a Jackie Chan movie, in that the action isn't nearly as abundant and the movie takes on a darker, more serious tone.  This is actually one of Chan's better efforts in recent memory, as people finally get to see him outside of the norm and do so admirably.  However, if you're in the U.S., you're likely going to get a badly dubbed version of this movie, so looking for the original version would be your best bet. 

The week that was...

The image you see above was taken as the sun was setting on Storrie Lake near Las Vegas, NM, which is about two hours north of Albuquerque.  Unofficially, that view was the beginning of my week in New Mexico, which included a stop in a town called Mora, where I have family and is actually one of the cooler spots in New Mexico.  I didn't make it to Albuquerque until 10 PM local time.  Monday was a trip to the Museum of Natural History and Sciences and the Old Town Plaza, which was followed by a walk through the Nob Hill neighborhood, which is across the street from the University of New Mexico campus.

Tuesday marked baseball night, as I went to see the Albuquerque Isotopes play the Omaha Royals.  If the Isotopes name sounds familiar to you Simpsons fans, it is because the baseball team on the show was called the Springfield Isotopes.  You may also recall that in one episode, Homer staged a hunger strike in order to keep the Isotopes from relocating to Albuquerque.  The home team lost, and rumors of Dancing Homer surfacing were unfounded.  Wednesday was Iron Maiden, which was good times.  The venue was practically out in the middle of nowhere with winds sometimes being really strong.  If you want to see how that show went, read "Iron Maiden Thoughts," which was written a few days ago.  Thursday was nothing of note, and Friday was getting a small sample of the nightlife in Albuquerque.  It could be better, but it's still better than Kansas City right now.  Saturday was a do nothing day, meaning a day to relax before heading back to the sauna that is Kansas City.

Now, to the stuff that happened while I was away:  First, because I didn't have cable where I was, I could not watch the World Cup.  Therefore, I had to check the scores online, and one of the things that caught my eye was the horrific officiating.  Now, before you jump on me, this isn't confined to the United States/Slovenia game.  Germany/Serbia had too many fouls called that probably shouldn't have been called, and Brazil/Ivory Coast had some missed calls.

Also while I was away, I read that the Montreal Canadiens traded Jaroslav Halak to the St. Louis Blues for a couple of prospects.  Predictably, Canadiens fans are livid about the trade.  I don't blame them, as Halak proved himself in the playoffs.  The trade leaves Carey Price as the team's presumed number one goaltender, and given that Price hasn't shown that he can handle the pressure cooker that is Montreal, this is not good news.  So, why trade Halak, you may be asking?  Price was a former first round pick, which means more money is tied into him than Halak and since both are restricted free agents, someone was going to be moved. I personally think this move was stupid because Montreal is setting themselves and Price up for failure.  A change of scenery might have helped Price, as he hasn't been the same goaltender that burst onto the scene in 2008.  The only way this trade works out is if Halak is exposed as a fraud, the two prospects the Canadiens got in return pan out, and Price lives up to the first round status.